A few nights ago, I was flipping through the hundreds of channels on my television when I stumbled across "19 Kids and Counting." I frequently watch this show for no other reason than to pass the time and for curiosity. This particular episode focused on the courtship between one of the older daughters and her intended spouse. They explained why there was no holding hands or physical contact other than a side hug before the commitment of engagement. Then, you get to hold hands. They explained that this encourages really getting to know one another prior to any physical relationship. They explained how they did this to honor God and themselves in keeping themselves pure prior to marriage.
The older daughters of the Duggar family have written a book called "Growing up Duggar; It's All about Relationships".
I thought about this after the episode was over. I thought about my own adolescence and then what has become the "norm" for young adults these days. It seems giving yourself physically to someone has turned into a casual thing. Don't get me wrong, I was not an angel growing up. I made my fair share of mistakes. I used those mistakes to try to teach my daughter how not to make those same mistakes. My heart was broken more than once by someone who I thought was committed to a relationship but was just looking for the quick physical gain.
Anyway, like I said, I was thinking about this episode of the TV show and I started pondering what if young adults today were to buy into the chastity program? Whether they do it for religious purposes or not, what could be wrong with it? A lot of relationships today end in divorce (if there was even a marriage to begin with). How many people go into a relationship and not really know everything about their partner? If you took an oath to get to know each other through conversation and experiencing things together without the added pressure of physical intimacy, how many more marriages would remain intact "til death do us part"?
At the risk of sounding like an old, wet blanket, our world is sliding down a slippery slope. People with little value for their lives, let alone others' lives. When is it time to stand up and fight for self worth?
Wednesday, October 8, 2014
Saturday, September 13, 2014
Prayer, Thought or Meditation....You Decide
It seems like it's no longer cool to admit you pray anymore. In today's politically correct environment, we have to be afraid of offending someone. Let's take a look at what prayer is, why it should be done, and what you can get out of it.
Prayer, by definition, is an invocation or act that seeks to activate a rapport with a deity, an object of worship or a spiritual entity through deliberate conversation. There it is....conversation. That's all it is really....a conversation.
Stereotypically, Christians will get down on bended knee, head bowed, eyes closed, hands clasped in front of them and have an informal conversation. Other religions involve more structure to the prayer process. The conversation can happen whenever, wherever and in whatever fashion you want. If you are not a person of religious faith, you can still have the conversation. Maybe it's Karma or Mother Earth....just have the conversation. Have you ever lost something in your home, said out loud "can someone help me find ______?" and then find the object in a place you would swear on your life you already looked? Ta da! Conversation.
If you have not prayed or had a conversation with your deity of choice, it may be intimidating to get things started. Let's think about any other relationship you have had. It was intimidating to get the conversation started at first, but it got easier after you got to know each other. Any relationship will fail without effective communication, so you have to work at it and develop a comfortable dialog. There are no rules...eyes open or closed, words spoken or thought, alone or in public...whatever makes you comfortable.
Start the conversation with something easy. Did you wake up this morning? Be happy about it and be thankful. Be thankful for the people who bring you joy in life. Have a loved one who is sick or troubled? Bring that up in conversation and ask for the person to be given strength of body and spirit, as well as healing. Is there a decision that has been weighing heavily on your mind? Bring that up in conversation, discuss the pros and cons of the situation and then ask for clarity of thought and guidance. Did you do something that you are not so proud of? Be sure to ask for forgiveness and wisdom to not repeat.
I think you will be shocked and amazed at the peace you will find by having these conversations. I know it has worked for me. I sleep better at night knowing I have had my daily conversation. I find myself thinking more clearly and having more humility as a human being. I subscribe to the thought and faith that there is a higher being than humans. We humans are at the top of the food chain because we developed our brain, but we also need some help occasionally. Don't be afraid to ask for it.
I am of the Christian faith. I believe there is one true God and that we pray to Him. That being said, I was also taught "judge not lest ye be judged." I am not in a position to judge others for the unseen party in their conversations.
I hope this sheds some light on this very complicated subject. If you take nothing else away from this, I would like you to take away the fact that you do not have to be a stereotypical Christian to pray, and that praying is essentially a conversation between you and your higher being of choice.
If you have questions, please do not hesitate to contact me. I love the dialog that can be generated with things like this!
Prayer, by definition, is an invocation or act that seeks to activate a rapport with a deity, an object of worship or a spiritual entity through deliberate conversation. There it is....conversation. That's all it is really....a conversation.
Stereotypically, Christians will get down on bended knee, head bowed, eyes closed, hands clasped in front of them and have an informal conversation. Other religions involve more structure to the prayer process. The conversation can happen whenever, wherever and in whatever fashion you want. If you are not a person of religious faith, you can still have the conversation. Maybe it's Karma or Mother Earth....just have the conversation. Have you ever lost something in your home, said out loud "can someone help me find ______?" and then find the object in a place you would swear on your life you already looked? Ta da! Conversation.
If you have not prayed or had a conversation with your deity of choice, it may be intimidating to get things started. Let's think about any other relationship you have had. It was intimidating to get the conversation started at first, but it got easier after you got to know each other. Any relationship will fail without effective communication, so you have to work at it and develop a comfortable dialog. There are no rules...eyes open or closed, words spoken or thought, alone or in public...whatever makes you comfortable.
Start the conversation with something easy. Did you wake up this morning? Be happy about it and be thankful. Be thankful for the people who bring you joy in life. Have a loved one who is sick or troubled? Bring that up in conversation and ask for the person to be given strength of body and spirit, as well as healing. Is there a decision that has been weighing heavily on your mind? Bring that up in conversation, discuss the pros and cons of the situation and then ask for clarity of thought and guidance. Did you do something that you are not so proud of? Be sure to ask for forgiveness and wisdom to not repeat.
I think you will be shocked and amazed at the peace you will find by having these conversations. I know it has worked for me. I sleep better at night knowing I have had my daily conversation. I find myself thinking more clearly and having more humility as a human being. I subscribe to the thought and faith that there is a higher being than humans. We humans are at the top of the food chain because we developed our brain, but we also need some help occasionally. Don't be afraid to ask for it.
I am of the Christian faith. I believe there is one true God and that we pray to Him. That being said, I was also taught "judge not lest ye be judged." I am not in a position to judge others for the unseen party in their conversations.
I hope this sheds some light on this very complicated subject. If you take nothing else away from this, I would like you to take away the fact that you do not have to be a stereotypical Christian to pray, and that praying is essentially a conversation between you and your higher being of choice.
If you have questions, please do not hesitate to contact me. I love the dialog that can be generated with things like this!
Friday, June 20, 2014
A background story and introduction
Hello everyone:
Do we, as a population, have a direction in life? What do we believe in? Is it OK to be religious anymore? Can we logically look at religious teachings and gain a basic direction for our life path in a non-secular way? Why do humans have so much trouble co-existing?
I have been journaling now for a while as a way to put my thoughts to paper and to de-stress. I find myself pondering what that heck is wrong with people these days. It brings back, in my mind, something my grandparents used to say. "This world is going to Hell in a hand basket."
Watching the news these days does make me wonder if the world truly is going to Hell in that proverbial hand basket. It is my opinion that more people than not are just wandering through this world with no real direction; be it a religious direction or a life path. It's easier to just follow the crowd. Some people, if they do have strong religious beliefs, are afraid to share them for fear of being chastised or of retribution.
It is not my place to preach to anyone else or try to impose my beliefs on others. However, I think we can look at lessons from religious teachings and apply them in a very basic form in a non-secular way.
Whew! That's pretty deep. Let's talk about where I am coming from for a while.
I was raised in the church. My grandparents on my father's side were very devout in their beliefs. They lived without modern luxuries like electric washing machine and dryer, television, etc. They dressed modestly. My grandmother, until she became too elderly and ill, made all of her own clothing. I remember her listening to nothing but gospel on the radio each day. She would sing along to every song. I could tell the ones she really liked because she would belt them out even louder. All of these years later, I still am immediately transported back to her kitchen whenever I hear certain hymns.
As I grew up, I became a rebellious teenager. I got multiple ear piercings (don't judge, it was the 80's). I wore outrageous clothes. I dated and ran around in a pack just like most young people of the day. My grandmother never was short for an opinion about that or any other topic, and she would try to make me see the error of my ways. Even though I wasn't what anyone would consider devout in my faith, I still believed in the basic principles. Once I got married and had children of my own, I tried to instill those basic principles in my children. Now that they are both adults, it will be up to them to continue on whatever life path they choose. I can only hope the principles they learned are enough to keep them healthy, happy and productive.
Now, for an example of what I was trying to describe at the beginning of this post.
Let's take Adam and Eve. Nothing like starting at the beginning, right? Let's not call them Adam and Eve though. Let's call them Justin and Brittney...or insert any kid's name. Instead of God, let's call it Parents.
Parents: Here is a wonderful house with a great big yard to play, lot of video games, anything you could want.
Kids: Thanks! We are grateful.
Parents: The only thing I ask is that you do not go into the fridge in the garage. That is strictly for us.
Kids: No problem.
Now, the kids have a friend over to play. Parents do not like this kid because they think he is a bad influence. Sure enough, friend convinces kids to get into the fridge in the garage.
Parents: Why did you get in the fridge in the garage after we told you specifically not to do that?
Kids: We didn't think anything bad would happen, and the food in the fridge was delicious!
Parents: Well, unfortunately, since you disobeyed the only rule we gave you, we are forced to take away all of your privileges. No more playing in the yard. No more video games. Nothing. You will have to work for money to purchase the things you need in life. Good luck.
See....when you put the Adam and Eve story into a non-secular context, it's less scary. It's still the same message, a good message at that, but it's less taboo to learn from the "parents" than from God these days.
Do we, as a population, have a direction in life? What do we believe in? Is it OK to be religious anymore? Can we logically look at religious teachings and gain a basic direction for our life path in a non-secular way? Why do humans have so much trouble co-existing?
I have been journaling now for a while as a way to put my thoughts to paper and to de-stress. I find myself pondering what that heck is wrong with people these days. It brings back, in my mind, something my grandparents used to say. "This world is going to Hell in a hand basket."
Watching the news these days does make me wonder if the world truly is going to Hell in that proverbial hand basket. It is my opinion that more people than not are just wandering through this world with no real direction; be it a religious direction or a life path. It's easier to just follow the crowd. Some people, if they do have strong religious beliefs, are afraid to share them for fear of being chastised or of retribution.
It is not my place to preach to anyone else or try to impose my beliefs on others. However, I think we can look at lessons from religious teachings and apply them in a very basic form in a non-secular way.
Whew! That's pretty deep. Let's talk about where I am coming from for a while.
I was raised in the church. My grandparents on my father's side were very devout in their beliefs. They lived without modern luxuries like electric washing machine and dryer, television, etc. They dressed modestly. My grandmother, until she became too elderly and ill, made all of her own clothing. I remember her listening to nothing but gospel on the radio each day. She would sing along to every song. I could tell the ones she really liked because she would belt them out even louder. All of these years later, I still am immediately transported back to her kitchen whenever I hear certain hymns.
As I grew up, I became a rebellious teenager. I got multiple ear piercings (don't judge, it was the 80's). I wore outrageous clothes. I dated and ran around in a pack just like most young people of the day. My grandmother never was short for an opinion about that or any other topic, and she would try to make me see the error of my ways. Even though I wasn't what anyone would consider devout in my faith, I still believed in the basic principles. Once I got married and had children of my own, I tried to instill those basic principles in my children. Now that they are both adults, it will be up to them to continue on whatever life path they choose. I can only hope the principles they learned are enough to keep them healthy, happy and productive.
Now, for an example of what I was trying to describe at the beginning of this post.
Let's take Adam and Eve. Nothing like starting at the beginning, right? Let's not call them Adam and Eve though. Let's call them Justin and Brittney...or insert any kid's name. Instead of God, let's call it Parents.
Parents: Here is a wonderful house with a great big yard to play, lot of video games, anything you could want.
Kids: Thanks! We are grateful.
Parents: The only thing I ask is that you do not go into the fridge in the garage. That is strictly for us.
Kids: No problem.
Now, the kids have a friend over to play. Parents do not like this kid because they think he is a bad influence. Sure enough, friend convinces kids to get into the fridge in the garage.
Parents: Why did you get in the fridge in the garage after we told you specifically not to do that?
Kids: We didn't think anything bad would happen, and the food in the fridge was delicious!
Parents: Well, unfortunately, since you disobeyed the only rule we gave you, we are forced to take away all of your privileges. No more playing in the yard. No more video games. Nothing. You will have to work for money to purchase the things you need in life. Good luck.
See....when you put the Adam and Eve story into a non-secular context, it's less scary. It's still the same message, a good message at that, but it's less taboo to learn from the "parents" than from God these days.
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